Whole

Witnessing

that which was once unbreakable

breaking  into pieces.

Disintegrating like dust

scattered into the universe

to haphazardly blow soft warnings

within the paths of those who have no inkling

of how quickly and without warning

the storms can come.

Venerating the pain for the lessons

which would have never been learned

in a lifetime spent chasing pleasure

without bearing witness to the

hidden side of the coin.

Gathering the slivers of light and benevolence

manifesting on the long road back.

Savouring the beauty and love

found in a child’s laughter or

the rhythmic crashing of the waves.

Renewal hiding in plain sight

for the lost ones blinded by the pain

with eyes closed in suffering.

Limitless room within

for the replenishing of what once was lost.

A wholeness of self.

Hope springs eternal.

 

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The Promise

Sandbox Writing Challenge 21 — Shhhh! It’s a secret. – http://wp.me/p5bWLb-1AW
What Have You Done That No One Knows About ?

When my brother was dying, he asked me to put his ashes in with our Dad.
I drove six hundred miles to honour that request,  only to be told that I was not allowed to do that.
The rule was two bodies per hole.
My Dad and infant son  were  already residing there.

I called back the next day, without identifying myself, and asked if I could plant a perennial at the gravesite as I lived far away and it depressed me to see the barren stones with no flowers.
Upon approval, I hastened to the greenhouse, purchased a lovely tiger lily plant and went to the cemetery.
I dug a hole, dropped my brother in, dropped the lily on top of brother and filled the hole in.
Done in under five minutes in the middle of a sunny June day, with a burial taking place five plots over to the right,  and what looked to  be a mildly intoxicated teenaged cemetery worker riding a mower to the left of me.
I have zero regrets and no shame.
In the back of my mind,  I knew I could likely cry my way out of anything serious in court if I was caught and fined.
There was also much irony as my brother had lived his life dodging the law and I knew he would be tickled at the thought that he had forced his sister to commit a criminal act in order to keep a promise.

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Taking Out the Trash

Sandbox Writing Challenge

If you could, what parts of yourself would you throw out?

I would toss my ridiculous, undying need to be hanging on the cross for all the addicts I have loved in my lifetime.

Tears, pain, regrets & sleepless nights all gone.

Tossed in the bag and triple-tied and then out to the bin.

That would ensure there is room in order to love in a healthy way.

I cannot throw my tribe away, but need to keep them at a safe distance and allow myself to have a good life, even if they can’t or died without achieving one themselves.